NEW YORK – “I used to have my act together. I used to wear earrings, belts and shoes with a heel,” Amy Wilson tells her audience. “Now look at me, my stomach hangs down over top of my jeans. In New York City, this is called a muffin top and it’s not good.”
Her lament earns laughs as well as nods of recognition from the group of mostly women, many of them moms or moms-to-be, who sip wine and drink seltzer as they watch “Mother Load,” Wilson’s new one-woman show about the tribulations and joys of motherhood.
The off-Broadway production, which is based on Wilson’s own experiences as the mother of 4-year-old and 2-year-old boys, is the latest entry in a growing genre that mixes motherhood, comedy and true confession. From coast to coast, moms are lining up for a night out at shows with names like “Mamaphobia” and “3 Blonde Moms” eager for a chance to laugh with their peers about diapers, spit up and strollers.
“Being a mother can be very isolating, very hard. But these are things we don’t often say to each other for fear of being judged,” says Wilson, whose credits include a Broadway play, movies and TV. “Doing this has been very liberating.”
“Mother Load” is about Wilson’s gradual transformation from a new, unsure mom to a more confident parent. She mocks Manhattan’s competitive preschool culture (but then applies to multiple schools for her son), frets about engaging her children in meaningful play and panics when a breastfeeding support group leader accuses her of “nipple confusion.”
But beyond the more predictable complaint like those about her fashion problems are harder truths, including an admission that her quest for perfect motherhood was making it hard for her to enjoy her kids, or even like them sometimes.
“I’ve changed as a mother since I started performing this,” says Wilson, who is now pregnant with her third child, due this fall. “I realized that the more I worried about being a good parent, the less of a good parent I was. I needed to relax and not worry so much.
“I want to say to other moms, just get down on the floor and play with your kids and enjoy them and don’t worry if it’s educational. Give them whatever for dinner. It’s OK to let go for a little while.”
Indeed, letting go of the guilt is a central theme on the mommy-theater circuit.
“When I was growing up my family had seven kids, and I do think a lot of the stuff people worry about today got blended in the chaos. Today, people have smaller families, we’re focused more on them, and we read all those books and make ourselves a little neurotic,” says Peggy Ward, who started her one-woman show, “Mamaphobia,” in 2003, inspired by her then 2-year-old son and baby daughter. “It can be wonderful to come out and laugh about it all because sometimes people feel like they’re the only ones struggling through this all.”
Laughter is the priority for all of these shows, with a heavy emphasis on personal struggles that don’t offend. Don’t look for SAHM vs. WOHM debates (that’s stay-at-home moms versus work-outside-home moms, for the uninitiated) or any other hot-button issues.
These actresses say they are aiming for more universal truths that bridge rather than create gaps.
“Motherhood is a common bond,” says Joanie Fagan, one of the three moms in “3 Blonde Moms,” a show she put together about three years ago. “Most moms are doing the best we possibly can even though our choices might be different.”
Fagan, who has a 6-year-old daughter, says another perk of the mommy circuit is the flexible work schedule. Her show tours, but only for brief periods.
“We just finished shows in Illinois, Cleveland and Sarasota,” says Fagan, whose credits include TV and stand-up comedy. “But we don’t leave the kids for more than two or three nights in a row because we’re moms first. And this job allows us to be full-time moms about 90 percent of the time.”
The audience for these types of shows appears to be growing. Fagan says “3 Blonde Moms” has filled 750-seat venues, with ticket prices reaching nearly $40. “Mamaphobia” ticket prices have ranged between $15 and $25.
“We find people will buy blocks of tickets and pile in a bus from the suburbs and come see our show,” Fagan says. “Whether (or not) you are a mom, you probably had a mom or know people who are moms, and these shows are something you can relate to.”
Wilson’s “Mother Load,” which runs about $45 per seat, just extended its eight-week run another week. Wilson would also like to write a book and dreams of taking the show on the road.
“I wrote this show for an out-of-town audience,” Wilson says. “New York may turn motherhood up another level, but I don’t think these issues are specific to the city at all.”
On the Net:
Mother Load: http://www.motherloadshow.com
3 Blonde Moms: http://www.3blondemoms.com
Mamaphobia: http://www.mamaphobia.com
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