Holiday traditions are typically something families pass down from one generation to the next. But when children are no longer nearby or are otherwise unavailable, what can couples do to fill the holiday season with anticipation and fun?

For two Lewiston couples who first met many years ago at an event their daughters attended and whose friendship developed as their girls grew up together pursuing similar interests, it was a natural progression to establish and share new traditions in the wake of becoming empty-nesters.

Each year, a few weeks before Christmas, the two local couples, Dan and Nancy Boilard and Joe and Donna Whelan, first go out to breakfast and then make the journey to local tree farms to search for the ideal Christmas trees for their homes. Coffee, conversation, and cutting down a tree make for an enjoyable excursion both couples treasure.

Then, one or two Saturdays right before Christmas, the couples reconnect for the next part of the season’s festivities: they climb into Joe’s “big truck with an extended cab” and hit the road to enjoy the holiday decorations in the Lewiston-Auburn area. Included in the tour is a visit to each others’ houses to view the fruit of their previous labors: their Christmas trees now embellished with holiday wear. Afterwards, they stop at a restaurant and treat themselves to a hot beverage and something sweet. Nancy chuckled, “Are you noticing a theme here? Food!”

To reinforce that theme, Nancy revealed that spending time and sharing food with Joe and Donna is something that seems to happen each season, such as when they get together on St. Patrick’s Day to savor Joe’s corn beef and cabbage or when they all dress in costume at Halloween.

“Each year we have a theme, like Zombies or headless horsemen” and give out treats to neighborhood ghosts and goblins who gleefully visit Joe’s “haunted garage,” said Nancy. Afterwards, the couples enjoy a late dinner together.

Echoing Nancy’s sentiments, Dan added, “I think the next best thing to family is to have friends that you care about to share a holiday like Christmas.” With further reflection on their friendship, he said, “You get to share the highs and the lows of bringing up your children and get support from each other.”

Joe’s comments further accentuate the warm regard these friends have for one another and his pleasure at being with them in their celebration of the Christmas season:

“Besides the fact it’s about family first, it’s about friends,” stated Joe, who expressed his delight in the stories they swap in the time they are together.

When asked about the details surrounding the beginnings of their holiday rituals, Donna, Joe’s wife, maintained that although she doesn’t remember exactly how things started between them in terms of launching some holiday traditions as friends, she does remember one Christmas eve many years ago when their children were gone elsewhere (they celebrate with family on Christmas Day) and it was her and Joe and she thought, “We have nobody. It’s Christmas Eve. So what do we do together?”

Donna’s viewpoint on their shared holiday experiences: “I don’t know many people who do that (have holiday traditions as friends). I think it is a fantastic thing. You can count on them. Laugh with them. It’s like they’re my extended family. We can share stories and say, ‘Remember the time we did this? Or that?’”

Although this year’s Christmas present to themselves was a trip to Disney World taken this past October (they traveled and stayed in a condo together), usually they go to Bar Harbor the last weekend before stores, restaurants, and hotels close at the end of the tourist season. Since the stores are closing and having sales, they do a little Christmas shopping and hunt for bargains.

“There are some real good deals,” Donna said, in reference to the discounts offered during this time in Bar Harbor. “I only have one grandchild and Nancy has five, so we’re always doing some Christmas shopping,” she laughed. “We look for good deals and something that’s different. [Other times] we go to the mall in Portland and we fill up my big car.”

In the background, Joe quipped, “We’re just a bunch of old people looking for something to do.”

Although colorful and carefully wrapped presents make the season bright, for these four friends, spending time together makes the holiday right.

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