School vacation.
Two words that send children giggling maniacally as they bounce from couch cushion to couch cushion, waving their cartoon lunchboxes over their heads like trophies of war. While parents clear their work schedules, cower under their kitchen tables and try to pry childproof caps off bottles of aspirin.
School vacation week can strike terror in the heart of the stoutest adult. Once you’ve taken your 7-year-old triplets to the library, the movies and on a play date complete with a blanket fort and four showings of “Finding Nemo,” what’s left to do? Good lord, what’s left to do?
Don’t worry, Mom and Dad. Need a jampacked schedule of fun/educational/kiddo-tiring activities? Bliss has your back.
Hang out, have fun, enjoy each other’s company. Make some school vacation memories. And save your aspirin for summer break.
Friday: Kora Shrine Circus, 4 p.m. and 8 p.m., Androscoggin Bank Colisee, Lewiston; tickets, $5-$12; parking, $3
Costumed, performing dobermans! Kick off school vacation week right.
Saturday: Lewiston Auburn Film Festival, L-A, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m.; Saturday pass, $22
Hmm, to see “Hamster Heaven” or “Barbarian Days?” Well, as the festival warns, “Viewer discretion is advised.”
Sunday: Portland Sea Dogs game, Hadlock Field, Portland, 1 p.m.; tickets, $4-$9
Watch the Dogs play the Binghamton Mets in what is sure to be a fur-flying game of baseball. Little ones will love watching mascot Slugger dance. Older ones will love rooting for their favorite Red Sox players-to-be. Weather permitting, kids 16 and under can run the bases after the game. Slide, Junior, slide!
Monday: Maine Wildlife Park, Gray, 9:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., tickets free for children under 3 and $5-$7 for everyone else
This is opening week for the park that features deer, moose and other rescued and rehabilitating wildlife. Check out Larry the Bald Eagle for a bit of school vacation majesty. Just be ready to tell your kids that, no, they can’t have one. Unless they can have one, in which case you are the coolest parent ever (with the proper permits).
Tuesday: Sabattus Disc Golf, Sabattus, 9 a.m. to dusk, $9 for a day pass or pay per round
Fling a Frisbee-like disc into the basket. Go for the challenge. Go for the fresh air. Go to watch your 6-year-old gleefully throw things without having to worry that he’ll hit your new flat-screen TV. Or, you know, you.
Wednesday: Maine Discovery Museum, Bangor, 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., tickets free for children 12 months and younger, $7.50 for everyone else
Pirates! Make an eye patch and fashion a pirate name in a one-hour workshop at 2 p.m. Bag Lady’s pirate name: Peg Leg Polly Jones.
Thursday: Sparetime Recreation bowling, Lewiston, noon to 10 p.m.; shoe rental, $2.60, $3.60 per game/per person
Would it hurt you to let the kids win one round? No, it would not. Relax, grab a bite of pizza and aim for the gutters.
Friday: Holeb Public Reserved Land, Jackman, open all day, no charge
Hike, swim, boat or camp on 20,000 acres of public land. Granted, it’s a little cold to swim, boat or camp, but hiking through 20,000 acres should warm you up. (If the three-hour ride to get there didn’t do the job already.)
Saturday: LC Bates Museum, Hinckley, 10 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.; tickets, $1 for children; $3, adults
Check out the Spring Bug Hunt at 1 p.m. Bag Lady and Shopping Siren would not typically scout for such things; this, surely, is where the influence of children enters into things. Let your inner kid out to play.
Sunday: Mantis Yoga for Children, Fields Pond at the Maine Audubon Center in Holden, 2 p.m. to 3 p.m.; tickets, $10 to $15
For kids ages 3 to 7 and their guardians. Parents can try downward facing dog with their little ones or drop off their offspring and head for the hills. Literally, since the event is held on the grounds of an Audubon nature center. Just make sure to circle back to reclaim said little one. School starts Monday!
Bag Lady and Shopping Siren’s true identities are protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who, being dogs of a certain age, like the idea of a hilly hike more than the reality of one) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach them at baglady@sunjournal.com and shoppingsiren@sunjournal.com.
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