CBC photo

I’m not sure if it’s a to-hell-with-this-year-too purchase — Bag Lady won’t be leaving the house, so it doesn’t matter, nothing matters, cue the violins — or a sign of the sheer whimsy and joy that awaits — Bag Lady WILL be leaving the house, so much, with abandon, cue the Black Eyed Peas’ “I Gotta Feeling”! — but I just made my first clothing purchase of 2021.

A Schitt’s Creek T-shirt.

I have binged what under normal conditions would be considered an alarming amount of TV in the past five months and have to say it’s been pretty darn nice/escapist. By the looks of things, we’ve got a few more months left before we can poke our heads out more and cavort, so, this week, the Bliss Unofficial Top 7 Shows To Binge While Binging Is Still Guilt-Free and, what the hey — merch to go with it.

7. HBO’s “The Lady and the Dale”: A fascinating docu-series about a woman trying to take on the big automakers back in the ’70s with a new, three-wheeled car. Elizabeth Carmichael should be under “chutzpah” in the dictionary. And, allegedly, grifter. There’s so many jaw-dropping reveals as well as a tie to Maine! Plus, a chunk of the story is told with adorable paper doll cutouts. It’s a lot.

Accompanying merch: Let’s just do a few slow passes through the local car wash on this one. ‘Tis totally the season.

6. Discovery’s “Mystery at Blind Frog Ranch”: A grizzled, near-retiree buys land in Utah that may have treasure, gold, alien saucers or D, all of the above. His “whatever, as long as it makes me rich”-attitude lends the reality show an air of authenticity and adventure. Please don’t tell Bag Lady if you’ve dug around and it’s really fake. I’m over here stuffing my ears with gold and saucers, I can’t hear you.

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Accompanying merch: Haribo frogs gummi candies, 8 oz., Walmart, $1.84

5. Disney+’s “WandaVision”: Wanda, Vision and a town perkily held against its will — but why? It’s pretty, Marvel-y, cool and Kathryn Hahn is the BOMB. I’ve clearly got to re-watch to soak it all in. And good news! There’s plenty of time for that.

Accompanying merch: WandaVision retro ringer T-shirt, ShopDisney.com, $26.99

4. NBC’s “The Good Place” (all four seasons are on Netflix): This one, about a woman sent to heaven by a case of mistaken identity, started as mindless background noise and a few episodes in, I was inadvertently hooked. Fifty-three episodes later = puddle of tears. But, like, wistful happy ones. Mostly.

Accompanying merch: What the Fork* mug, NBCstore.com, $16.95

*Characters on the show can’t swear in heaven. There’s lots of forks and benches.

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1. Three-way tie: CBC’s “Schitt’s Creek” (on Netflix), Netflix’s “Space Force” and Apple TV’s “Ted Lasso.”

Yeah, I told you — it’s been binge-mania.

All three are hilarious, delightfully full of heart and so worth your (endless, will we ever leave the house again) time.

“Schitt’s Creek” in particular is a bit Maine with its town politics and local characters, and just really amazing, hence all the super-deserved accolades.

Accompanying merch: We can’t be twinsies, so I’m going to suggest the subtle Rosebud Hotel shirt (SchittsCreek.shop, $28), so when you’re walking down the street, someone spots it and says with only the smallest crinkle of their eyes over their mask, yeah, I loved that show, too.

Just hope my tee arrives soon. I’ll crinkle right back atcha.

Bag Lady’s true identity is protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who have started marking their territory everywhere, a sure sign of spring) and the customer service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach her at baglady@sunjournal.com.

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