A couple weeks ago fellow columnist Bob Neal wrote in this paper about several words he thought “we can jettison.” If you’re expecting a rebuttal you’re going to be disappointed — in fact I couldn’t agree more with him.
Since I’m always on the lookout for something to write about, I usually have no problem with taking somebody else’s idea and running with it. But this time I’ve decided to do a 180 and go with something that I’ve actually been thinking about for a while: words that should be brought back into everyday use, but for one reason or another have been deemed obsolete (there are 47,156 of them, according to the Oxford English Dictionary).
I’m not talking about words such as “golly,” “gee whiz,” or “swell” (although I have included a few other exclamations), but rather some of the cool old words we all used to use, at least if you’re of a certain age.
You know the ones: “zounds, “egad” and “gadzooks.” What could possibly inspire one to utter such words you ask? Well, maybe you just saw something that was the “cat’s pajamas” (coined in the 1920s to denote something of excellence).
It turns out that politics and government offer a great opportunity to revive some older words. I contend that “gobbledygook,” which was invented by Texas congressman Maury Maverick, should be revived. The word describes wordy prose that confuses more than it informs.
We have President Warren G. Harding to thank for coining “bloviate,” which is a combination of “blow hard” and “deviation.”
And, during his 2019 campaign, our current president single-handedly brought back “malarky” (insincere or foolish talk) when he famously promised that there’d be none of it.
Let’s face it, a lot of these old words and terms would be very relevant in today’s world of “hidebound” (narrow and rigid in opinion) politicians, where nearly every vote is along party lines simply because of convention.
Is it any wonder there are so many “curmudgeonly” (bad-tempered) “grumbletonians” (people who are unhappy with the government), given that each side generally considers the other to be a “kakistocracy” (a government by the least competent people).
And then there’s the aide to former Vice President Mike Pence, who recently said President Trump had received advice on the 2020 election from “snake oil salesmen,” yet another term that deserves a second look.
And speaking of snake oil salesmen, how about all those over-the-counter herbal remedies that are endlessly being pitched to us? It’s not like me to be cynical (kidding), but I think a few choice old words would be more than appropriate to describe those scoundrels and their much-ballyhooed “nostrums” (products of questionable effectiveness that promise quick results).
Since all of these concoctions have to state that they “have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration,” you have to wonder if the ads pitching them are just a lot of “hype,” a term coined by showman Billy Rose 70 years ago when he referred to the hypodermic needle of narcotics lingo to promise “No fake suspense, no hyped-up glamour.”
I hope you liked this look at some of our older words and phrases that ought to be put back into use, and are thinking something like, “That’s the ticket, it really filled the bill.”
On the other hand if this week’s offering was not your “cup of tea,” you might have found yourself thinking, “Hey, word guy, enough with your ‘harebrained’ ‘confabulation’ already. ‘Put a sock in it.’ ‘Scram!’”
Jim Witherell of Lewiston is a writer and lover of words whose work includes “L.L. Bean: The Man and His Company” and “Ed Muskie: Made in Maine.” He can be reached at jlwitherell19@gmail.com.
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