It’s a bit HomeGoods. A bit Michael’s. A bit Jo-Ann Fabric. A bit hide-your-wallet.
Hobby Lobby is the sort of place that you could easily come in for a picture frame and walk out with $50 worth of Marvel Comics drawer pulls.
In our inaugural trip through its shiny new doors, Bag Lady and Shopping Siren discovered watering cans, onesies, 20-inch antiqued aluminum letters, hula party supplies, Star Wars posters, rocket ships, flip-flops, foot rests and wedding candelabras for rent.
To name just a few.
That lack of a central retail theme was a little overwhelming, and of course, intriguing. What’s around this next end cap — burlap ribbon? Die-cut Spider-Man room signs? Hot pink bling-covered staplers? (Answer: Yes, cubed.)
The general vibe is nicely lit, row-upon-row department store. Hobby Lobby’s funky pricing, though, is something we’ll have to get used to. Several store signs say things like, “Furniture always 30 percent off” and “Home accents always 50 percent off,” so why not, um, just price it accurately to start?
To thwart coupon usage? For the Jedi mind trick of a good deal? (Answer: Maybe. But we’re too busy over here cradling our 3-foot-long filigree wall-art lobster — $30! Normally $59.99! — to figure it out.)
There are also other unusual things about Hobby Lobby. It doesn’t open on Sundays. It doesn’t use bar code scanners, preferring instead to rely on employees to keep track of stock. And you may have heard something about a little U.S. Supreme Court case.
But if you want (nay, need!) half a dozen Star Wars or Marvel Comics drawer pulls, Hobby Lobby has your back.
On a separate, completely unrelated note, our bureaus will soon be Marvel-ous.
* Spiral candelabra, $60 per pair to rent, $300 to own
White, spirally and tall, these candelabras are lovely and romantic. Pair with the white sweetheart arch ($40 to rent, $175 to buy) and you’ll have wedding-goers weeping at the beauty even before the first strains of the “Wedding March.” So place tissue boxes accordingly.
* The BeDazzler, $9.99 (mini) or $19.99 (original)
Oh, 1980s, how we’ve missed you. In case you don’t remember (or weren’t born yet. Gah.), the BeDazzler allows you to quickly and easily snap rhinestones and shiny studs on, well, everything that’s not nailed down. And possibly a few things that are. Because everything is better with bling.
* Blinged office supply items, various prices
You know what your desk is missing? A tape dispenser covered in hot pink faux gemstones ($6.99). Also, a bright blue bling-covered wireless mouse ($14.99). And a desk clock covered in pink faux gemstones and standing on a spring so you can flick it back and forth ($19.99). See the aforementioned theory, “Everything is better with bling.” That includes work.
* 20-inch wall-hanging aluminum letters, $29.99 each
Like those seen on the TV show “American Pickers,” only new. And not rusted. And also not $200. Looked like a good letter selection, if a bit short on vowels. So J.R.’s room is all set. Leela’s, not so much.
* Iron-on appliques aplenty, various prices
The baby aisle surprised us with lots of toddler accessories and clothes just waiting for the right iron-on. Bag Lady was a bit more mustaches ($4.99) than Hello Kitty or Day of the Dead ($3.99) but to each her own.
* Burlap ribbon, 15 feet, $5.99
In black, tan, red, chevron print or lace-fringed. There are so many uses! We suppose. Or else they wouldn’t make so much of it, right?
* Fake food, various prices
Snag a realistic weight and size apple for $5.99, an artichoke for $4.99 or an amazing faux-chocolate cake with strawberries for $29.99 to create the best little kiddie play kitchen ever.
* “Let’s All Go To The Lobby” old-timey metal sign, $29.99
Straight from the drive-in snack bar to your home theater. Trim your toilet paper into tiny, stiff squares for the complete drive-in experience.
* Marvel character 12-inch metal cutouts, $19.99
In Spidey, Wolverine, Iron Man and others. Have an old-school comic fan in your life? Total score.
* Estes Flash rocket set, $24.99
A rugged, easy-to-use beginner’s rocket. For high-flying (up to 925 feet!) fun and a science education to boot. Just be careful. You know what they say: It’s all fun and games until somebody scares the neighbor with a rocket.
Best find: Pop culture drawer pulls, $7.99 each
Flat, glossy knobs bearing the Batman logo, Darth Vader’s image, the Marvel Comics logo or, simply, “Pow!” in comic book style. We both wanted to grab fistfuls of these. Bland dresser? Vader it! Boring bureau? Batman! Kitchen cabinets a bit drab? Pow, Pow, Pow and Marvel! You will wake at 3 a.m. just to open and close things.
Think twice: About forgoing Jo-Ann or Craft-Mania to make the shiny new Hobby Lobby your only crafting stop. Is there room for all three in the Twin Cities? Answer (we hope): Yes.
Bag Lady and Shopping Siren’s true identities are protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who are not better with bling, so back away with the BeDazzler) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach them at baglady@sunjournal.com and shoppingsiren@sunjournal.com.
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